Ice cream? We still have that strawberry Breyer’s no one likes, remember?
Don’t Invoke the 14th Amendment. It’s Old!
Look at it. It’s too old!
I Was There: THE Ohio State Chronicles
Here are a few snapshots from a weird weekend.
Tips for Pretending You Haven’t Googled Someone and Scanned Their Social Media
If they say, “I’m heading home,” don’t say, “Oh, you mean 1128 Ellis Avenue?”
Can Football Ever Be Safe?
3 Reforms and Their Outcomes
Budget Cuts at Bayside
The gang’s back and the budget’s thinner than ever!
My Most Recent Cartoons To Date
Cheeseburger in Dagobah, Uno!, Jane Eyre, and a Magazine Fit for Pharaoh
"We Couldn't Make Up Rules Fast Enough"
It’s time to legislate our way out of this.
Jack Del Rio's Statement on Other Major World Events
“Archduke Franz Ferdinand had an interesting encounter with a bullet.”
Jesus Christ in the Teacher’s Lounge
Teacher, Teacher, what must we do to earn extra recess?
Six Blind Men Go To Whole Foods
“To this day, we disagree about the nature of an elephant. Surely, we will also have vastly different assessments of Whole Foods.”
The Best Nana Stories Ever
She was a furiously devoted wife, mother, grandmother, great grandmother, great great grandmother, teacher, church member, neighbor, friend, and sports fan. And she wasn’t taking crap from anybody.
Georgia and Alabama in Talks to Form the Charmin Ultra Strong Super Mega Conference
They will lift the lid on how exciting football can be.
As the Only Residents of Southwest Michigan, My Wife and I Could Give a Rip About COVID
Sophisticated adults are capable of winking at overly stringent guidelines. I’ve been winking a lot lately.
LEAKED: Brian Kelly’s Schedule of Upcoming Events
“December 2021: Coach LSU in the Coke Zero Presented by Coinstar and Eckrich Sausage Liberty Bowl”
12 New Must-Read Parenting Books
Find out which books are new in the age of new books.
Your Labor Day Was Good, But Was It "Picnic"-Level Good?
Did you show off your awkward basketball skills, chucking the ball at the hoop with a two-handed chest pass while hopping in the air like a bunny?
The Little Red Hen Gets Vaccinated
“Then I will go get vaccinated myself,” said the Little Red Hen. And she did.